"I've been me my whole life, and I've had these powers for 6 months, and I read books, I build computers, and yeah I would love to play football. But I couldn't then so I shouldn't now." "Sure. 'Cause you're different." "Exactly. But I can't tell anybody that, so I'm not. When you can do the things that I can, but you don't... and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you."
"You have a passport?" "No I don't. I don't even have a driver's license-" "Ever been to Germany?" "No." "Oh you're gonna love it there." "I can't go to Germany!" "Why not?" "I got... homework." "Okay... I'm gonna pretend you didn't just say that."
"What's up, guys? Forgot your PIN number? Whoa! You're the Avengers! What are you guys doing here? Thor, Hulk – nice to finally meet you guys. Thought you'd be more handsome in person. Iron Man! What are you doing robbing a bank? You're a billionaire."
"Did Liz get a new top?" "No, you've seen that before. But never with that skirt." "We should probably stop staring before it gets creepy though." "Too late. You guys are losers." "Then why do you sit with us?" "Because I don't have any friends."
"You're the Spider-Man... from YouTube!" "No! No, I'm not! This is just a costume!" "You were on the ceiling!" "I wasn't! I, wait, what are you doing in my room?" "May let me in, you said we were going to finish the Death Star! Wait, she doesn't know?" "Nobody knows! Well, Mr Stark knows because he made me my suit but that's it!" "Tony Stark made you that? Are you an Avenger?" "Yeah, basically. You can't tell anyone, you have to keep this a secret!" "A secret, why?" "Because you know what she's like, if she finds out that there are people out there who try to kill me every night she won't let me do this anymore!" "Okay, okay, okay, okay, I'm going to level with you, I don't think I can keep this a secret, this is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me!"
"Can't you just be a friendly... neighborhood Spider-Man?" "But I'm ready for more than that now!" "No, you're not." "That is not what you thought when I took on Captain America!" "Trust me, kid. If Cap wanted to lay you out, he would have."
"Maryland." "What's there?" "I don't know... evil lair?" "Evil lair?" "Dude, a gang with alienguns run by a guy with wings? Yeah, they have a lair." "Badass. But how are you going to get there if it's like three hundred miles away." "It's not too far from D.C.."
"Wow, they're in the middle of a heist! I could catch them all red-handed, this is awesome! Okay, I'm gonna get a little closer so I can see what's happening." "Would you like me to engage Enhanced Combat Mode?" "Enhanced Combat Mode? Yeah!" "Activating Instant-Kill." "What? No, no, no, I don't wanna kill anybody!" "Deactivating Instant-Kill." "What the hell just happened?" "You jumped off a sign and landed on your face."
"So, to become an Avenger, are there like trials or an interview?" "Just, don't do anything I would do. And definitely don't do anything I wouldn't do. There's a little gray area in there and that's where you operate. That's not a hug, I'm just grabbing the door for you. Alright, kid. Good luck out there."